Monday, October 3, 2011

Busted


My cover was blown last week.  A piece of advice to those who blog anonymously - decline the "remember password on this computer" feature.  Because one day your husband's computer wiz friend may come to your house to help with some computer-related thingy and discover that you are Subjugated Wife.  And he may do this in front of SubHub, who is not big on self deprecating humor or jokes at his expense.  And even though SubHub may know for years the name of your blog and associated with it email account, etc, etc, etc, he may still not be 100% comfortable that his wife calling herself "subjugated," albeit semi-publicly.  And SubHub may be even less thrilled with his friend now knowing that you call yourself "subjugated."

If are lost by now, I don't blame you.  It was, I mean it could potentially be an uncomfortable mess.  And then you may find yourself mumbling things like "tongue-in-cheek" and "almost inactive," while quickly excusing yourself from their company.

Now that I've typed it, I am wondering whether this is being read by The Friend and whether I should edit it.  And while it wouldn't bother me one bit if some man in Timbuktu reading this blog accidentally finds out my real name, a real life acquaintance finding out is a completely different story.

So now I am faced with several options.  1) Abandon this blog.  I doubt, with my blogging activity of the past year, anyone would truly notice.  2) If I were to do #1, that would probably mean abandoning blogging altogether in the foreseeable future.  Even though my readership is very small, at least I know that a few people are still reading it.  I don't have the resources to invest in the new blog.  I don't have time to either regularly write or work on increasing readership.  And I am not above admitting that blogging into the empty void does not appeal to me.  I know, vanity.  3) Pretend that nothing happened.  Which is probably the most accurate description of the event.  After all, The Friend came to help and had no intention to snoop. As I have found out on a few previous occasions, I am not as anonymous as I thought and hoped.  And I doubt that The Friend would run around putting up posters all over the 'hood identifying me.  Or even if he did, it very unlikely would stir any interest or would result in public recognition.  But  a girl can dream stranger things have happened, that's for sure.  (I am still wondering whether The Friend is reading this right now and whether this post can cost SubHub a friendship.)  So even though the whole thing might be in my head, it already is affecting my blogging.  4) Feeling relieved that finally my secret is out and I no longer have to hide is not even an option for reasons that include Jewish guilt, Soviet upbringing and others that are too complicated and more appropriate for other media, such as a case study for Psychology Today.

So there, I am thinking.  Knowing myself, I would not post anything for the next 3 weeks or months, and by the time of the next post, would forget the whole thing.  But then again, stranger things happened.



(And if you have this song stuck in your head for hours, you can thank me in the comments :)

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